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I don't just paint what I see. I also paint what I feel. This goes especially for my self-portraits. I try to look deep within and visualize my emotions. I identify with my emotions. They seem to be reliable indicators of who I am. I often rhetorically ask myself, "Is anyone in there, and if so, who?"
Painting allows me to release my emotions without restraint. When my brush forcibly grinds against the skin of the canvas I am rubbing myself, quite literally, into the texture of my paintings. When the abrasion is complete, paint, color, and the squelched fluids of the psyche burst forth and gush out into public view. They run their course, they coagulate, and they heal. There is relief and there is renewal. I try to open and close the wounds smarting in some of us.
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